My Dad

Monday August 10th we buried our Daddy. We knew he would not want to live very long without our Mom who passed in September 2008, but he did pass all our expectations. Once he got sick he willed himself not to tarry and he didn't.
I am fortunate that the good Lord made me aware that I needed to go see him and I did and he did recognize me.
I hated to see him as he was unable to get up , talk or handle every day things. The pain to me was indescribable however I did all that I could for him while I was there. As much as I hated seeing him living like that I hated the ineveitable phone call that I knew was coming and when it came on August 4th, the realization that I would no longer see that smile or the frown or hear the stutter (from his stroke), discuss golf or Yankees/Rays/Boston, tell hilm about my dog or my kids filled my heart with pain.
I did his Euology and I doubt that I gave him his due. To me I remember the look when he brought up some puppies from the new litter of beagle that he was raising, washing the garbage truck, the lessons he taught me, hunting, fishing, tracking in the woods, how to change the oil, fix the tire, do the plumbing, singing all the old songs in the car late at night when we were cominog home after his calls after work, the time he tore his tendons and couldn't drive, so I got my licesne, the time he burst in to the labor room when I was in labor with my Hunter and the nurse sent him out and wouldn't let him in., how we almost ended up in the Chenago River when he drove me to Lourdes the night of his anniversay, when Josh was trying to be born, teaching me about the church, trying ot teach me shortcuts in math that I never could get until long past my classroom days. Tellimg me over and over you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, hlis charm and how the ladies loved him--- his love for my mother, how he loved surprises, how he treated his Mom , hils family evryone.
I have been doing well but when the American Legion did the first volley of the 21 gun salute, I felt an arrow pierce my heart and I have been grieving ever since. I wanted to cry out but I knew he would not expect that of me so I held tight to Mabel Wrench's hand and thought O God! This is really true, My Daddy has died. I have never felt so lonely in my whole life.

I guess I am not a serious blogger I have been busy however, the flowers are ordered for Josh and Jenny's wedding I have worked on a project for her bridemaids and I have emboirdered her adn Josh's name and date for the ring bearer pillow. I have decided to make a small pillow from muslin and then cover it iwth the sating cover as I couldn't find a small pillow form. I have 6 hippo squares appliqued for my quilt that I am making for a special someone. I can't wait to get back to work on that.
My foot is better and I didn't wear my boot Saturday when shopping I was in and out of the car so many times and it's heavy to drag around buy the time I was at Burlington Coat Factory I was aware that I should hlave owrmn it. I stayed home from work today and I didn't wear it today either but did keep my leg up all day long and slept most of the day KP says I don't feel hot but my body feels hot. I didi eat a good supper and just before supper I was sweating all lover the place so I think I feel better. I am going to bed as it is 10;10 AND I am still tired. I finished the book the Seaside Kitting mystery by Sally Goldbaum. I'll have to see what else she has written.
I am not good this week ever since I saw the Passion of Christ or whatever that Movie was that Mel Gibson did I hate the thought of Holy Week I just can't believe that someone could do what they did to one person and how HE withstood it all. I also feel guilty that I can't even begin to live up to His deeds and he asks so little of me. I had told my Mom this but I have never expressed this publicly and I 'm hoping that now that I have maybe I can overcome some of the dark thoughts that follow me during this time. Please pray for me.

Saturday My Favorite day to post

I'm in a really happy mood. I have really had an easy day. I woke up with a Migraine but i think if maybe from the Oak pollen so I am trying to forget and get on with my life. I read yesterdays and todays paper and did some wash, changed the bed, read some emails. Found a hippo embroidary applique for a quilt I want to make for a special youn g lady I know. I think I will do 12 Squares adn make the hippos from material to the match the special holiday or season of that month. I think of April as a shower Month adn I'm wondering what fabric I will use for that month. Something with umbrellas? If anyone has any ideas I'm open to that. We have been really busy at work but it is starting to slow down and even though I know $$ wise that is not great I am glad to be able to get out of work earlier. KP's baseball team lost theilr game last night to ARCH RIVAL Pasco but the boys played together as a team, were ahead a couple of times and only lost by two runs so they should be proud of themselves. The weather is so good I have to remember each time I look out the window to Thank the Good Lord for this paradise.
Tonite I am taking KP to Tampa to buy a suit for the wedding. I have purchased my dress and it is on it's way and I am dieting so I'll look much better in it. I have lost 4 pounds so far this week.
This will be Kp's first suit and I know that he will great in it ---I am having a hard time convincing him-----but this is a shorts and tee shirt guy so who knows.
Now I only have to work on that dancing part and he'll be perfect to me.
Pray that we get some rain soon. WE are so dry that they are asking everyone to clean up all yards and get rid of dead stuff and leaves. I really wanted to leave the leaves on the back yard this year to get some compost on it. but I guess we need to rake I hear them really crunch when I take the dog out. Well this is short but I have things I want to do so Im off.

Well lit has been two month's since Ihave osted anything and I haven't been quilting much either. I have been at work a lot more than I want to be. Thank God we turn the clocks aheaad this weekend. Even though I will miss an hour of sleep Iwill be glad to get some more light so that I can ride my bike two or three nights a week. Hopefully we will get warm weather also. I moved to FL for warm weather and so far I have not warmed up since last October.
My angel trumpets that froze this winter are starting to come back and my camelias were outstanding and think what they will be next year if I fertizile and mulch.
I am going shopping this weekend for a dress for Josh and Jenny's wedding. I have seen a simple dress adn I will get that if I don;'t find something I like better. The dress I am looking at is sapphaire blue -- my Mom would love the color and it should look nice with my hair. We have to get KP to the store adn get a suit and etc. Meg and Jill and Missi are coming I may take an extra day off from work just to spend a day with them. I am anxious to start quilting I have my fabric for the kitty/dog block I am making for the charity quilt to send to one of my quilter buddies in the quilting group I belong to. I think I will make two blocks and reverse the colors and background.
I saw a new tote I want to make and I was thinking of making them for friends and relatives for christmas they are quick and have a couple of extra pockets which I think are grand.
Off to bed. It's late and I must read a few pages before sleep takes over.

Jan 4 09

It is not like a winter day in FL it is 81degrees and warm. I look at things I need to do but I seem to be tired to day I didn't sleep well as I couldn't hear KP breathe adn I kept feeling his back to see if he was alive. Glad to say he was, but he never moved when I touched him adn that is unusual the illness seems to be getting better and I think he will try work tomorrow. I have a roast that and mashed potates for dinner and that shouidl perk him up. He only has to work two days now and then next weekend were are cleaning his closet and setting up the new bed frame.
Aslan dan I went ot the dog park adn he romped and then I came home adn made3 a French coffee cake for pot luck at church I brought home beef stew from church adn Kp thouight it was pretty good. I long to write to my sisters and tell them how I feel I am really moving along with th grieving process but I don't want to upset anyone so I think I'll wait a week or so. I know that we all move at different times and ways and I don't want anyone to be upset. I am so blessed to have Mary Ellen in my life to help me. We support each other adn she is about a month ahead of me. I may have to cancel my massage for this week as I think I have a Dr's appt this day iadn I have waited 3 or 4 weeks for it so I need to go to that. Off to the sewing room to catch up on my 40 minutes of sewing There is a 2 hour skating program on so maybe I can sew for almost all that ti me. Sandee

First of 2009

I have decided to try to quilt or sew or embroider on my machine afor at least 10 minutes each day as of today I am 30 minutes behind but I intend to change that tomorrow. Kp has been sick since Tuesday adn I am worried because even with the Zpak he doesn't seem any better adn I know that many people had this and went right into pneumonia and didn't know it. He never stays home from work and it has been 3 days and he doesn't eat much all bad signs. I saw a cute quilt in my new magazine with elelphants and I think I shall make it for Abby. I have also decided to write in my blof at least two tiems a week adn to start practicing my keyboard again. I am also joining a weight loss contest at work and I want to get the new walking sticks that are like ski poles to see if they help me with my breathlessness. I have been so encouraged by all the projects that the members of the quilterbees have been talking about and doing I must improve and the only way I can do that is by working at it. I am also doingthe round robin quilt project and I think all will be surprised. It is 12:25 pm and I am really tired so I'm off to the bed. It's a new day tomorrow.